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MTA’s Little Drummer Boy

MTA’s Little Drummer Boy

A young boy, not more than 10 years old, is walking through the number 6 train in New York City at 10:45pm. He is carrying a black book bag that has some stains, drumsticks and a drum with him. On his face is a mixture of emotions ranging from determination, sadness and frustration. Around his neck, instead of a gold chain, he wears a beaded necklace showing the colors and flag of his country, the Dominican Republic.

In true panhandle fashion, he shares that he is trying to raise some money and he will play some music on his drum. He sets his drum on a seat between two people. The little drummer boy begins to play. The wall, seat and floor become his extra drum support in his little show. Some are annoyed. Finding it to be very loud noise, they cover their ears. They completely lose what he is showing: passion, strength and determination to be heard.

As he sees the annoyance of some, he plays harder, determined to finish. He wants to put on the best show that he can. The better the show, the more money he can earn. For this little drummer boy, it isn’t just noise, it is his way of earning money using what he loves to do: play his drum.

Upon completion, he looks around and asks if anyone is willing to give him some money. It seems only fair. A show for a dollar. It has become common place in the New York City transit system. Only this is different.

Here we have a little boy walking through the trains playing his drum for money. He should be home in bed getting ready for school. Have New Yorkers become so jaded that seeing this has little to no affect on them? As I watched the faces of my fellow passengers, it seems it did not faze them. Only an event of massive proportions like Mother Nature’s fury or war are the only things that can shock.

As I laid my head on my pillow that night, I thought about the little drummer boy on the 6 train and prayed he would go home, sleep and wake up to be just a little boy who loves to play his drum. No worries. Just a boy and his drum.

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Posted by on May 24, 2013 in Life

 

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The Pursuit of One Girl’s Dream

A dream. That’s how it starts. There is something to be said for dreaming about something. After all, things can Seize the Dayonly happen when it is dreamed about. Nothing was ever achieved by sitting on your butt in hopes that it would be handed to you. It has to be dreamed about it. It has to be desired. It has to be loved and nurtured.

That’s what this is about. The pursuit of my dream.

I’ll be honest. There are times when I am afraid of achieving my dream. I know it sounds silly. The thought of success can be frightening. I’m not sure why. I never truly understood that. Probably because I feel that the more successful you become, the bigger your failure can be. So despite knowing that I can succeed in what it is I want to do, I do nothing. Or I just do enough to keep me where I am comfortable rather than where I can be successful.

Is this making any type of sense to you? Hoe about we keep it as I am very complicated. Some who know me will describe as sometimes being so simple that I am complicated.

So what is my dream? To be a great sportswriter. To a Lisa Olsen-type of writer. She was a sportswriter I admired when i was in school. I read almost all of her articles in the New York Daily News. When one of my articles on my Mets website was linked into one of her articles on Aol’s Sporting News page, I was ecstatic.

What happened between now and then? I got scared. I started to fear success. Well no longer. Nothing was ever achieved by not doing anything. I have to keep going. I have to keep pushing. I have to remain confident. I have gotten to the point where I even started to doubt my abilities. That should never happen. Once you get to the point where you doubt yourself, your dreams start to get out of your reach.

Here is where I make the decision to keep on. Want to join me? Let’s seize the day.

For more on pursuing your dreams, take a listen to tonight’s Raise Your Glass program on Blog Talk Radio.

 
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Posted by on January 18, 2013 in Life

 

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The Sad State of Sports Media

This would normally go under my sports page. However, I think this can go up on any site because it is the truth. I want to know when sports media became the laughing stock of all media. When did it go the way of TMZ and channels such as E! and other entertainment outlets?

While I was studying broadcast journalism in college, a professor asked me what I wanted to do in broadcasting. I said I wanted to be a sports journalist. This professor, who was also an Emmy award winning journalist, just laughed. She proceeded to tell me that it was not a real job. Sports media is a joke, is how she put it.

Why is it a joke? When did this happen?

Once upon a time, ESPN was a highly respected sports news outlet. Now so many of their viewers find them laughable. They have lost the respect of their audience and I wonder if they even realize it. If they did, you would think they would change things.

Yesterday a news story broke out about Jets football coach, Rex Ryan with a tattoo of his wife wearing his quarterback, Mark Sanchez, jersey. It was spotted on his arm as he and his wife are vacationing in the Bahamas. Vacationing in the Bahamas. Vacationing! The very word means they are not around for conversations with the media. Yet sports journalists find it necessary to become paparazzi and hound a football coach. They feel the need to invade his privacy.

Why should fans of the New York Jets care what tattoo he has on his arm? For that matter, why should they care about his foot fetish with his wife? The obsession with Tim Tebow when he came to town was ridiculous. From his faith to pictures of him running without his shirt on was enough to get the die hard fans shaking their heads.

These are not stories fans care about. They want answers as to why they Jets were so bad this season. They want to know why their coach still has a job. Will their QB come back next year? What will happen with Tim Tebow? Would the season have ended differently had Tebow been allowed to play more? This is what matters to Jets fans.

When Adam Rubin of ESPN New York tweets about the style of sweater New York Mets owner, Fred Wilpon, is wearing while entering an elevator from the baseball winter meetings, (as he did last year), I start to wonder if Joan Rivers will start a conversation with Rubin about the style. Mets fans want to know why he is still owner? What will it take for baseball Commissioner Bud Selig to seize the team from an owner who seems ill equipped to handle this team?

Fans do not care about what is going in the personal lives of their players unless it affects their performance and the status of their team. Maybe it is the fault of the fans constant demand of information on what is happening with their team, owners and league that has pressured the media to have a story everyday no matter what it is. Some would place the blame on the fans. Others blame social media networks like Twitter. Personally, if there is no story, then there is no story. You do not bring down the legitimacy of your outlet with stories that leave your audience, your readers shaking their head and wanting to forget all about you.

To all sports media outlets, you are paid to do a job. It is to report about sports. You are not to report about what is happening in their personal lives. You are not the paparazzi. You are not TMZ or E! or Style. Please refrain from reporting every little detail of what is happening. Do not make stories where there are none just for the sake of having a story. Oh and trying to spin the tattoo story so that it looks like a real story by talking about the tattoo having an impact on who Ryan put out on the field to play, does not work.

Then they wonder why the fans turn to bloggers for information regarding their teams.

 
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Posted by on January 5, 2013 in Media

 

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I Resolve…Wait! I had a revelation.

The year 2012 was supposed to be my year of greatness. It was supposed to be the year where I achieved the greatest things. Instead, I only accomplished one thing: college graduation.

Now some might think that in itself is a great achievement. For me, while it was wonderful, especially sharing it with my closest friends, colleagues and family, I wanted more for myself. I’m not complaining. I’m just pointing out some things to myself. Some things that I came to terms with.

I have another website. It is dedicated to the New York Mets: CitiField of Dreams. Well this past year was supposed to be the biggest year for that site since it launched a few years ago.

I decided to start doing videos. My readers were excited about it. It started great. Unfortunately, it didn’t continue. Call it laziness. Call it being preoccupied with other things like school and work.

Whatever it was, I was very disappointed. I was upset at myself. Blogging and reporting about the Mets was once a passion of mine. I lived for it. I was dedicated. I did whatever it took to get the job done from cutting class, being late to class or even being late to work to finish a blog post.

It seems I lost my drive. I’m not sure when it happened. But I think it happens to all of us at some point. It doesn’t matter how passionate we are about something, at some point we lose the drive to do the very thing we loved to do.

This is why I detest resolutions. We always start out strong and passionate about them, but when it comes down to it, not many of us get anywhere with them. You probably will do great with exercising for a good month or eating healthy for a few weeks. At some point, you might fall off. Resolutions just set up us for failure. A public failure at that.

So with that said, I have every intention of using revelations about myself from last year to make the new year a better one for myself. I suggest you do the same. After all, as Damian Lewis said: “People need a revelation, and then they need a resolution.”

Here is to a healthy, successful, and peaceful new year. Make it your best year yet!

 
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Posted by on January 2, 2013 in Life

 

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One Nation, Under God

Total devastation. That is the only way to describe what has happened here on the East Coast thanks to Superstorm Sandy. As many of you know, I live in New York City. Born and raise here. I am very proud of that. It has broken my heart to see all of the suffering around me.

With that pain, comes anger. Too many have turned this disaster into a political match. They have linked it to the presidential election.

This is not about politics. This is about everyone coming together for something greater than themselves. Listen to the stories coming out of this storm. People have lost family members. They have lost everything.

Whatever happened to the golden rule:

Do unto others as you would have them do unto you?

People in New York have gotten into fights trying to get on a bus just to get to work. People are attacking our politicians for decisions they have made. It is not easy being in office and making the tough choices. It is so easy to attack and to criticize. Forgive them for their mistakes. They are human just as you are. Do you mean to tell me you have not made critical errors in judgement?

Understand that we are not going to get through this by attacking. We will get through this with faith, patience and understanding. We are here to help each other, not to attack. I love a lot of the things I have seen among my friends on Facebook where they are offering their homes to those who need a hot shower or to charge their phones. I love seeing the posts for others where to get gas and some who have offered to pick up gas for those who cannot.

I want everyone to understand this. It is not easy to make decisions as to who should get aid first. There is so much devastation around from the Jersey Shore to Staten Island. This isn’t just about New York. It is about New Jersey, Connecticut, Pennsylvania and all of the other states affected by Superstorm Sandy.

Thank you to all of the utility companies from other states who have come up north to help restore power. I salute you. Thank you to those who have offered your time to help feed the hungry and clothe those who lost everything. Everybody can do something to help. From volunteering to donations of all types, there is a job for each and every one of us.

We are the United States of America. We the people make up what is considered to be a great nation. It is time we stand united, not apart. It does not matter who you are voting for. What matters is that we come together, one nation, under God.

 
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Posted by on November 2, 2012 in Life

 

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Powerful Facebook Status from Tyler Perry

There are so many stories that we hear about. Stories that we say are inspiring. Yet I cannot remember the last time I have been so moved by what a celebrity wrote like I was when I read this letter. I almost cried. It renewed my faith in my dreams.

There are so many times when I feel like giving up, like I am not going to make it. I have to remember to keep the faith, to keep praying and to keep seeking the Lord’s will. Sometimes He uses the most unlikely individuals to inspire us to where He wants us to be.

Tyler Perry’s Facebook Status/Letter

July 10, 2012

Why did I put all my money into this? Is this going to work? God, do you hear me? Where are the people? I’m so scared. How will I pay these people? Why did I do this? I can’t pay my rent, they are going to repossess my car…

The year was 1992, July 8th-12th. All these questions were crowding my mind. I was a 22-year old wannabe… but what I wanted to be I didn’t know. All I knew was that I had written this play about adult survivors of child abuse and I wanted the world to see it. I was so sure that it was going to work that I put my own money into the show.

I had worked as a used car salesman and a bill collector and saved my income tax check and my bonuses. I took that money and hired a cast and built a set and rented a very small theater in Atlanta called the 14th Street Playhouse. I had done all the math in my head: I was going to perform 6 shows, 200 people a show, for a total of 1,200 people. The tickets were $12 and I was going to make $14,000 and be rich… LOL. I was going to give my tithe to the church, give my mother some money, pay my rent (that was two months behind), get my car payment caught up and live happily ever after. I knew as sure as I am sitting here that it was all going to be all right. I had prayed that thang out, as they say in the Baptist church… LOL. Looking back on it now I can laugh, but back then it wasn’t so funny. What I quickly realized is that prayer alone will not always get the results you want. As much work as I did, I didn’t do enough to promote the show. More work was needed to go along with my faith.

I was expecting 1,200 people but only 30 showed up. I was devastated. I thought my dreams were dead. Based off this one thing I thought my life was over. Based on this one failure (what I thought was a failure but it clearly wasn’t), I thought that the rest of my life would be ruined. Needless to say, looking back on it, it was all a part of God’s plan and amazing design for my life. And God has a plan for all of our lives.

Today I celebrate my 20th anniversary in show business. It’s been an amazing journey, one that I will detail in my autobiography one day. You would be surprised, inspired, angry and blown away with what I’ve endured to be here, but until then I’d like to share a little inspiration with you. So many times we think that because one thing didn’t go as planned we should give up on it. So many people leave their dreams dying on the floor, gasping for air because it didn’t work out the first time. Be it marriage, business, children, faith, whatever your dream is, you can’t give up because it didn’t go as planned. If I had walked away because it didn’t work you wouldn’t be reading this. I had to keep moving. Yes, there were setbacks. Yes, it was difficult, but I got to see my dreams come to pass because I never stopped moving forward, I never stopped praying and most of all I never stopped believing. DON’T STOP BELIEVING!!!! PLEASE DON’T STOP BELIEVING!!! Say this to yourself out loud right now: “DON’T STOP BELIEVING”, and repeat it to yourself whenever you doubt that you can make it.

What you must understand is that everything, all of it, the good the bad and the ugly, it all works together for your good. If you love the Lord you are called according to His purpose. What’s His purpose for you? If you’re not sure, seek it and all your dreams will come true.

To all my dreamers, to all the people who have invested in themselves, to all the people who have the same questions that I did, hear me when I say this: YOU CAN DO IT!!

CELEBRATING 20 YEARS IN SHOW BUSINESS TODAY!!!!

God Bless you, in Jesus’ name, AMEN!

-Tyler

 
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Posted by on July 20, 2012 in Life

 

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Confidence Can Hit Rock Bottom

I have often spoken about being confident. I stress being confident in every aspect of their life: looks, job,
abilities. Unfortunately for me, I find myself often lacking the security in myself.

Graduating from Brooklyn College should have been enough to show me that I can do more than I thought I could. I juggled work, three websites, two podcasts and school. I would work an average of 30 hours, study for 10 hours, work on podcasts for two hours and blog for a total of 10 hours a week.

It was a lot of stress. But I made it. I got through it.

Stage two of my life is set to begin in two to three weeks. I’m scared. More like terrified about what is about to happen. All of the thoughts you don’t want to run through your mind, do.

Will I find a job?

If I do get a job, will I be any good at it?

The job market is so bad. What have I done to deserve a job?

Cue in the extra pressure.

If I can’t find a job, how am I going to afford rent?

What about food?

Was school a waste, if I cannot find a job?

It feels like life is just one big ball of stress. All confidence has gone out the window. I forget all of the things that I have accomplished. Did I do anything worthwhile?

How do people who live with doubt in their lives? It feels almost impossible to do it.

I say all of those because some people have told me that I inspire them. Well, here is where you get to know that I have all sorts of emotions that run through me. I doubt myself profusely. I get up every day and hope that I can accomplish something.

With every blog, Facebook post and podcast, if I can encourage one person, then that is all that matters. That will have made my life worth living. I would be able to rest in peace.

The bottom line is that we have to believe in ourselves. If we don’t, why should anyone else believe in us?

 
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Posted by on June 21, 2012 in Life, Work and School

 

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Eddie Cantor Says…

 

“Slow down and enjoy life.

It’s not only the scenery you miss by going too fast – you also miss the sense of where you are going and why.”

 
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Posted by on June 9, 2012 in Life

 

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Busy Bees Miss Their Entire Life

I was messaging my friend, Todd, on Facebook this morning. It wasn’t that long ago. About five minutes ago (9:18am EST). When I asked how he was doing, he said he was “keeping busy”.

Why?

Why is that we always find ourselves in a position where we are always keeping busy? As a society, I’ve noticed that most of us are constantly moving. Seldom do we sit still and just breathe. Even sports fans. Go to a baseball game and you will see people hardly stay in their seats for more than 5 innings. They get restless.

Why are we always on the move? It is like we are running away from something. We don’t want to face something in our lives, so we keep moving to avoid hoping it won’t catch up to us. Maybe you should stop and think that perhaps with you constantly moving, you are missing out on some potentially wonderful things that could happen in your life.

It really is as simple as stopping to smell the flowers. Instead of eating at your desk, go to a park for lunch. Instead of hitting the busy stores, window shop with friends. Take a vacation with friends or by yourself. Create some ‘me’ time. You need it. Lord knows I need it as well.

I try to take advantage of every minute I have to myself. While sleep is a wonderful thing, I am not talking about sleeping the time away because you will still be missing out on life. The point is to go out and enjoy it. Forget about your worries for a day. You can deal with it tomorrow.

Bottom line: SLOW DOWN! Enjoy what life has to offer. Busy bees will always miss their entire life. All they do is work. We weren’t designed to always work. Take a day to enjoy yourself.

 
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Posted by on June 9, 2012 in Life

 

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Priorities: Not the easiest to keep in order

People are always talking about having priorities. One of the things we hear constantly throughout our lives is: 

Get your priorities straight.

We hear it growing up. We hear it as adults. We hear it while in relationships. How many actually listen though? Who takes the advice to heart?

There are quite a few people who need to learn this. It took me a little bit of time to follow this advice.

So what are the priorities of life? I think of it this way. Ask yourself what is most important in your life. Those things are your priority.

In my case, my priorities are as follows:

  • God (faith)
  • Family
  • Love
  • Me

The “me” category is vast. It covers things like a home, food, job, bills, etc. You get the point. Things like cable, games, video game consoles, etc., are considered luxuries. They aren’t priorities. They aren’t necessary for life. Things like having a home to live, food to eat and a job to pay for it all are.

People are part of our priorities. Looking out for those we love. Keeping our word is important and means a lot in this world. If you can’t keep your word, then why should anyone listen to you or trust you? That’s another topic for another day.

Back to priorities. Determine what those priorities are. Stick with them. Those are the most important things that are necessary for life. Sometimes it isn’t easy to keep these things in order.

There are so many other things that we want to do. Maybe go shopping or a vacation or a game. Unfortunately, we have to keep reminding ourselves what matters most.

<—-Remember this! It is relevant to every part of our lives from work to home life. Stop making excuses. You claim things are important. You claim things are a priority. Then find a way to take care of these things.

Sanity should also be a priority. Haha!

 
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Posted by on June 8, 2012 in Life

 

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Celebrate Good Times

It was a week to remember. The countdown began towards my graduation from Brooklyn College with a degree in Broadcasting Journalism. I thought the day would never come. It came and went by too fast. I wish the day was longer. I worked hard enough for it.

There are so many ways to describe that day. So many ways I can described what it meant to me. I even told my dad I wasn’t sure I was going to ever get to this point. I did!

I got to celebrate with friends and family. Those who I love the most were there to celebrate a giant milestone in my life. Some of them were celebrating the same milestone. Others were there just to party with me.

As I sat there in my cap and gown, I thought about everything. There was a lot that happened to me between going back to school and graduation. I battled inner demons like depression. I could say I failed at things, but I didn’t because I learned from them. I moved on past other things. I didn’t let anything stop me.

For me, the motto for the class of 2012 is: Strength, Determination, Faith and Love! RISE UP!

I heard a great speech from Senator Chuck Schumer. Even if we make mistakes, we can always get back on the horse and keep on going. Never stop dreaming. Never stop believing.

We all battled. We all made it. We thrived on the strength of each other. Meeting some of people I graduated with was a huge turning point in my life because they made all the difference in the world. I met a mother who was pregnant while in school and didn’t let that stop her from finishing a documentary we had to do for class. I met a girl who is probably the most positive person ever. She never appeared stressed out.

There were others.

I had a Professor who fought hard along side me and never let me fall. When I wanted to give up, she pushed me harder. She believed in me. She helped me come up with the idea for my first documentary “Empowering A Community”:

I accomplished so much. I worked so hard for it. While I was in school, I worked, blogged for several websites, recently started to host two podcasts while appearing as a guest on several others. I have come a long way from the insecure woman I was.

On Thursday, May 31, 2012, I rose up and showed the world what you can accomplish even when the odds are against you. To the class of 2012, we made it. We struggled, we stressed, we cried, but we did it!

Congratulations!

To all of my readers, listeners, friends and FB family, thank you for believing in me. Thank you for your continued support in everything I did. It makes all the difference in the world.

 
 

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Raw Emotions Revealed…Finally!

Raw Emotions Revealed…Finally!

How far is the east from the west? It is an interesting question because it can go on forever. Nobody can ever really tell you just how far it is. You would have to set two points on a map. Are you talking about from New York City to Los Angeles? Maybe China to New York?

There are endless answers to that question.

I enjoy listening to Christian music. It helps my soul. it feeds it. It softens it. I’ve always been a person who refuses to feel anything at times because I don’t want to be hurt. Yet Christian music opens me up to feeling. Maybe you know what I am talking about.

So I was listening to this one song be the Casting Crowns called “East to West” and it got me thinking about things. How often do I just sit around and think about my past mistakes? How often do I think about the things that put me in the situation that I am in today: no husband, no children and no career? How often do I think about the nights I spend alone crying myself to sleep or on the train almost in tears because I feel like I have failed everyone around me because I am not where I should be at this stage of my life?

This is who I am. I am a person who dwells on the past. As much as I try not to, I see those around me and where they are in comparison to where I am and I just end up spiraling out of control again. (Yes I suffer from “grass is greener on the other side” syndrome. Remember last week’s show?) I start to get scared because I feel like I am not going to be able to get back up this time.

Depression is the scariest thing to deal with for me. It never completely goes away because there is always that stupid voice in the back of your head that keeps coming back to taunt you. It reminds you of your problems, your failures and how you probably will never get to where you have always dreamed of being.

I’ve given up on things like success and marriage. I’ve given up on life at times and just want no part of it. I’ve cried so many tears to the point I can no longer see because they are so swollen. I get these little red spots under my eyes from crying so much.

I’ve screamed, cursed, hit and thrown things. My emotions tend to run high. I’ve completely collapsed from crying. People don’t see this side of me. I don’t let them. Not even my family has completely seen this dark side of me. At least to the fullest extent of it anyway. And they’ve seen a lot. My family has gotten scared that one day I just won’t be around anymore. It is their biggest fear.

But I’m here. By God’s mercy and love, I am still here.

And this is where I ended up thinking about this song. Even when I feel like the darkest part of me is coming back, that is when I really do have to just let go and let God.

Sometimes “I start the day, the war begins, endless reminding of my [past]”. I know His “truth is [sometimes] drowned out by the storm I’m in”. The scary thought is I also feel like “I’m just one mistake away from [Him] leaving me this way”. Where that comes from I don’t know. He has always “turned my darkness into light”. I just always need His “peace to get me through. I can’t live by what I feel, but by the truth His word reveals”. There are days when I don’t hold onto Him, but He’s always “holding on to me”.

When it comes His love, there is no such thing as point A to point B. It is infinite.

“East to West” by Casting Crowns

 
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Posted by on May 26, 2012 in Depression, Life

 

Attitude Determines Altitude

Attitude Determines Altitude

There is something to be said about your attitude determining how far you will go. Former New York Jets coach,
Lou Holtz, had this to say about attitudes:

Ability is what you’re capable of doing. Motivation determines what you do. Attitude determines how well you do it.

During last night’s show, I talked about having the right attitude. I spoke knowing what your abilities are; knowing you can do. Now the right motivation will help you do whatever it is you want to do.

You know people are always saying they need to be motivated in order to work out? You would think trying to fit into their bathing suits by summer would be motivation enough. Yet, if you don’t like to go to a beach or a pool, that doesn’t help you. A person needs to find their individual motivation.

Some people are just too lazy. Being lazy can be an attitude as well. So if you are lazy, I guess you are not going to do whatever it is you had wanted to do. You will always be standing still. You’ll never move up. Everyone will pass you by. Then what are you going to do? You can’t blame anyone around you because you chose to have the wrong attitude.

As we go through our lives every day, we have to determine what our attitudes will be. When you wake up every morning, you have to decide what your attitude for the day will be and maintain it no matter what happens.

I spoke about a co-worker who had been having a string of bad days lately. He woke up on Tuesday and decided that he would have a good day. He told me how he read is Bible on the train and was listening to gospel music. For the rest of his work day, he was great. The difference was instead of dwelling on what he disliked about the job, he was ready to have a good day. He was determined. He was motivated. He knew he could and he did.

So what type of attitude do you have?

Go through the week with this thought in mind:

Change the way you think, and you can change your world forever. Your attitude determines you altitude.

To listen to last night’s show, “The Right Attitude”, click here.

 
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Posted by on May 26, 2012 in Life, Work and School

 

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A Prayer for Finals Week

If you are a college student, you are undoubtedly going through finals week right now. So here’s a little prayer to help get you through it:

Now I lay me down to rest,

A pile of books upon my chest.

If I should die before I wake,

That’s one less test I’ll have to take.

Good luck to all of you. I’m sure you will be amazing. Godspeed!

 
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Posted by on May 22, 2012 in Work and School

 

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My Best Isn’t Good Enough? Ha!

Ever have that feeling where no matter what you do, it feels like it isn’t good enough? Story of my life!

There are so many days where I feel like that. I feel like no matter how hard I try, there isn’t a single bloody thing that I could do to make people happy. Somebody always wants more. This is definitely something I go through at work. On days where I feel I did an amazing job at something, They are quick to say, “Well you could’ve done this better” or “Yeah, but this…”.

There really shouldn’t be a situation where someone tells you “great job, but…”. It irks the life out of me. When I work with my associates, I always try to be positive.

Sometimes you have to be your own cheerleader. I had one associate tell me how frustrated she was with a manager. I asked her, “Did you do your best? If the answer is ‘yes’, then don’t worry about what she said. If the answer is ‘no’, then you know you have to do better.” Her response was, “I could’ve done better.”

There lies the difference. If you know you have given something your all, then who the heck cares what others have to say. I’ve actually told my manager this. If I know I gave you my best, then the problem is not me.

What some seem to be missing is that nobody can ask you for more than your best. So if that is what you are giving, tell the rest of the world to back up.

 
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Posted by on May 19, 2012 in Work and School

 

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Motherhood Fully Defined

Motherhood is a choice you make everyday, to put someone else’s happiness and well-being ahead of your own, to teach the hard lessons, to do the right thing even when you’re not sure what the right thing is…and to forgive yourself, over and over again, for doing everything wrong.”
― Donna BallAt Home on Ladybug Farm

How is that for a definition of motherhood? A mother is probably the most selfless person on this earth. A mother’s instinct is to put her children before herself.

I have my own description of what a mother is:

Mothers carry us in their wombs for nine months and love us unconditionally even before they know what type of hell we might possibly bring upon their lives. They hold us for the first time and think about how beautiful we are. They promise to protect us and nurture us. They stay up late to nurse us back to health when we are sick and cry with us when our hearts are broken. They celebrate our biggest accomplishments and make us feel better when we feel we have failed.

No matter what we do, we know that we can always come home to someone who has loved us since day one.

Isn’t that something? No matter what we do, our mothers will always welcome us home with open arms. She will always be there for us.

During my program last night to celebrate Mother’s Day, I spotlighted two amazing mothers: Aida Dujarric of Cabecitas Lindas hair clips and Virviane Myers. Both are hard working and have accomplished so much while being a mom.

My mother was a guest on the show last night and it was fun. We talked about some of the best memories she had with my sister and me. We talked about her reaction to finding out she was pregnant for the first time. I got to hear what it means to be a mother from my very own mom.

Some of my best memories with my mom involve shopping, experiencing all New York City has to offer since I’ve lived here all my life and Walt Disney World. My mom and I have so much in common from loving old movies to Disney. She taught me some of the most important lessons like respecting yourself. How can you expect others to respect you, if you don’t show them you have respect for yourself?

The one thing that I would’ve loved to have gotten from her was her cooking skills. Maybe I am just lazy. She can take a whole day to make a meal. I don’t have the patience for that. It is way too much for me. We love watching Christmas movies together. We have a tradition where every day during the month of December, we watch a different Christmas movie. Let me tell you, she has the biggest collection of Christmas movies I have ever seen.

This woman has cried so many tears with me and for me. Despite living in Pennsylvania with my dad and sister, she would cook for me and send food my way. It was awesome! To me, she is the ultimate mother. She has faith, love, cooking skills, appreciates the classics and has so much love that she insists on sharing it with other kids. This is why she is a teacher.

Despite living in PA, my mother and I make it a point to chat on Skype. We have even watched movies together through Skype. Thank God for technology. It has helped my mom and I get closer. Or maybe I just got older and have come to appreciate my mom more. Whatever the case is, I’m so happy my mother is in my life. A day does not go by where I don’t think about her. This despite her Skype-stalking me. Haha!

To all of the moms out there, Happy Mother’s Day! I hope your children spoil you rotten.

To listen to the entire show from last night, including my interviews with Aida and Virvian and my chat with mom, click here.

 
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Posted by on May 12, 2012 in Uncategorized

 

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Living in the Present Instead of the Past

This past Friday, I spoke about living our lives in the past. To be honest, I am very much guilty of this. There have been many days when I look around me thinking about the past and how I wish I could go back to it.

Why do I do this? There were times when my life was not that great. Yet, for the most part, I had a great childhood. The teen years are what the teen years usually are: difficult and awkward. This does not stop me from enjoying what I did get to do. We tend to focus on those times.

Let’s be honest. When a relationship goes south, don’t you start thinking about past relationships and how maybe they weren’t as bad as you thought?

This is probably one of my favorite quotes regarding the past:

The past is a good place to visit, but I wouldn’t want to live there.  -Author Unknown

We need to stop looking at our past and start living in our present. Some people start thinking about the past and want to relive it. The past is in the past. Relationships, friendships and other past associations are gone. As Edna Ferber, and American novelist and playwright once wrote, “Living the past is a dull and lonely business; looking back strains the neck muscles, causing you to bump into people not going your way”.

Some people are not meant to be in our lives anymore because they would no longer impact our lives. Why would we want them back?

Allow the past to help you become the person you are meant to be. Do not let it run your present life. What made you happy yesterday, may not make you happy today. Enjoy the memories. Today, however, make new ones.

To hear last week’s program, click here.

 
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Posted by on April 30, 2012 in Friendships

 

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